Re: Mrs. Confused

Asked by Tzippora · October 22, 2006 · Comments

Question

Having read Mrs. Confused's account of her daughter's dating experience, I would like to extend my good wishes to their family. I am confused, however, why she says "Our only criteria has been four grandparents who are born Jews. " I have seen boys rejected because their mothers are converts, and girls have engagements broken when her chatan's father finds out that she is adopted. Is there not a d'oraita prohibition against mistreating the convert, and are we not commanded to treat them well, just as we must help the yatom and almanah? What, then, is the rationale for preferring, much less discriminating against, converts or their descendents?

Answer

Answered by Chaim Yisrael Abadi

Thank you for bringing that up. However, there is a little merit to her one criteria, but then she needs to realize that she made an already tough process, tougher. Yichus (a person lineage) is important, but the type of boy/girl is much more important. This is a very trying time in a parent's/child's life. Many people are nervous of these situations because of reasons that may or may not be true reality. However, (wrongfully) perception is more important nowadays than reality. This is the post I assume you are discussing - http://kashrut.org/forum/viewpost.asp?mid=13032 CYA